wah i should be ever so flattered.
==================================
Anyhow, really back to God's will and all. Things that spoke to me from the book...Hearing God's voice by Henry Blackaby...again.
1) there's a difference between perceived needs and real needs man may have.
Which means, what u think u need, God may think, "No, you don't need it" or
"I want you to struggle for a while first". Many examples in the bible in Chronicles
and Kings on this.
2) when your will too far off from God's will, that's where, the prayer
is not answered.
3) When prayer is meant to make u learn who God is even more. (an example of people who are spiritual and right before God praying for their loved one to return to health but he/she wont because simply God wants them to release him/her to Him. And they had to learn to trust that He would care for their loved one in his own divine way)
4) Accepting God's "No" is a mark of faith and trust and maturity.
5) Yiyi, Matt, Jane (3 gals) at Grace T's wedding today happened to mention
the same thing which was "Trust God" and "Wait for your job to arrive......" which
is really really....probably the hardest thing for me to do. In all aspects of life.
Waiting. I prob have to wait a few more months for my next stable job.
or maybe even longer!!....but anyhow....i would rather have my life in the best/most perfect will of God.
6) Unconfessed sin makes our prayers useless.
7) Lack of faith renders prayers useless.
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Thursday, December 25, 2008
childlike faith
sometimes it just boils down to childlike FAITH
i could pray forever and chant like a meaningless gong.
or i could utter but one sentence, mean it,
with all the smallest simplest childlike faith i know
let the prayer go.....
trusting the Father will be pleased
even with my littlest faith.
i could pray forever and chant like a meaningless gong.
or i could utter but one sentence, mean it,
with all the smallest simplest childlike faith i know
let the prayer go.....
trusting the Father will be pleased
even with my littlest faith.
Sunday, December 21, 2008
$$ lost and compensated!
resolve, reconcile, restore.....relieved!
i'm thankful and very relieved to say that whew, the previous post's misunderstanding thing was resolved the very next day of musical production. its definitely due to prayers we had as a group....before, during and after each rehearsals and performances.
and the money stolen was anonymously returned to the both of us. not by the person who took it at first but by someone else who was blessed to be a blessing. :)
i'm thankful and very relieved to say that whew, the previous post's misunderstanding thing was resolved the very next day of musical production. its definitely due to prayers we had as a group....before, during and after each rehearsals and performances.
and the money stolen was anonymously returned to the both of us. not by the person who took it at first but by someone else who was blessed to be a blessing. :)
Saturday, December 20, 2008
angst
majorly frustrated
if there is such a word. dun feel like elaborating. but this is what i want to say to the person(s) today whom i met and he/she can see it from my face: "look don't give me this **** thing ok. don't think i was never in a girls' school before and don't know how to deal with girls like you."
but i didn't tell her.....i could have been wrong, u see. thats why i feel frustrated. its this inner conflict wrestling in me.....either one of us could be wrong....or both.
i lost my $$$. don't want to accuse or think wrongly of people but this is too much and i aint the only one losing the money. one other performer lost $200!!! way more than me.
if there is such a word. dun feel like elaborating. but this is what i want to say to the person(s) today whom i met and he/she can see it from my face: "look don't give me this **** thing ok. don't think i was never in a girls' school before and don't know how to deal with girls like you."
but i didn't tell her.....i could have been wrong, u see. thats why i feel frustrated. its this inner conflict wrestling in me.....either one of us could be wrong....or both.
i lost my $$$. don't want to accuse or think wrongly of people but this is too much and i aint the only one losing the money. one other performer lost $200!!! way more than me.
Sunday, December 14, 2008
in quietness or in chattiness?
gee, this is soo weird! i have listening bouts and chatting bouts and sometimes, neither of these. what i mean is sometimes i just wanna listen not talk. i suspect its more like a girl or a woman gotta talk her 5000 words a day quota. that's according to the author of 'men are from mars, women from venus'. lol.
but i really could have given a pat on my back today for risking getting disappointed or scolded today by running an errand for my parents. I went to that place alone!! whew! it went successfully because....
over the past 2 months i avoided doing this good deed for them, and prayed a lot for it as a result to make up for it. and now i guess u can never see how the Holy spirit works in people. so.....today came the results. woo hoo.
i can't emphasise enough how important prayer is before a competition, before anything crucial, exams, etc etc.
and the ministry of reconciliation and restoration is the central theme of the christian life. why is it never easy working at it.....reconciliation?
but i really could have given a pat on my back today for risking getting disappointed or scolded today by running an errand for my parents. I went to that place alone!! whew! it went successfully because....
over the past 2 months i avoided doing this good deed for them, and prayed a lot for it as a result to make up for it. and now i guess u can never see how the Holy spirit works in people. so.....today came the results. woo hoo.
i can't emphasise enough how important prayer is before a competition, before anything crucial, exams, etc etc.
and the ministry of reconciliation and restoration is the central theme of the christian life. why is it never easy working at it.....reconciliation?
Friday, December 12, 2008
debate between grace and the law
Looking at scripture on these
Galatians 2:21 "I do not set aside the grace of God, for if righteousness could be gained through the law, Christ died for nothing!"
Galatians 3:18 For if the inheritance depends on the law, then it no longer depends on a promise; but God in his grace gave it to Abraham through a promise.
John 1:11 "He came to that which was his own, but his own did not receive him. 12Yet to ALL who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God"
John 1:17 For the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ.
Romans 4:16 Therefore, the promise comes by faith, so that it may be by grace and may be guaranteed to all Abraham's offspring—not only to those who are of the law but also to those who are of the faith of Abraham. He is the father of us all.
Ephesians 2:8 For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God.
James 5:16Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.
my question: would you rather have a life with lawlessness, or with law? (Seriously ponder on this)
Galatians 2:21 "I do not set aside the grace of God, for if righteousness could be gained through the law, Christ died for nothing!"
Galatians 3:18 For if the inheritance depends on the law, then it no longer depends on a promise; but God in his grace gave it to Abraham through a promise.
John 1:11 "He came to that which was his own, but his own did not receive him. 12Yet to ALL who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God"
John 1:17 For the law was given through Moses; grace and truth came through Jesus Christ.
Romans 4:16 Therefore, the promise comes by faith, so that it may be by grace and may be guaranteed to all Abraham's offspring—not only to those who are of the law but also to those who are of the faith of Abraham. He is the father of us all.
Ephesians 2:8 For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God.
James 5:16Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.
my question: would you rather have a life with lawlessness, or with law? (Seriously ponder on this)
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
the doulos ship.
this christian ship was parked at harbour front for 3 days for public viewing. well its bascially a ship with a bookstore inside. selling kids books and christian books. its sister ship is the Logos. on board the ship serving are the crew who are from various nations. who are on the ship to serve one another and also send out the literature to each country they stop at and to meet the countrymen of each country....and give out tracts.....i'm sure they have a lot more activities than i can list....but it was a gorgeous sight. with the bonus of an all-international cast, or rather, crew. to stay on it for 3 months to serve would cost S$2000 approx.
somtimes i wonder, is it better to have a boring but predictable life or an exciting but limitless and crazy one?
somtimes i wonder, is it better to have a boring but predictable life or an exciting but limitless and crazy one?
Saturday, December 6, 2008
pain
Pain.
Two incidences of physical pain these two weeks woke me up to realise the importance of sincere prayer.
The first was last tues when food poisoning or diarrhoea came with bad cramps ( the girl thing). I was slouched or doubled over on my chair at work, face probably white....and the only thing i could do on the way home (when working hours were not over) was go "God...help." "God, please take away the pain....help."
Then it struck me. The most heartfelt sincere prayers come from our souls or spirits when we're in the most pain or disorientation. That's the kind that we mean with all our hearts. Shouldn't we take that same desperation and sincereness to our daily prayer life?
The second incident of pain was today. I had this strange flu virus or rather, muscle cramp virus that seemed to ache and poke every single muscle i had (arms, legs, belly, neck, shoulders etc etc). And the weird part was there was no sore throat or food poisoning. so why this ache? And the worst part was, i had to take my friend to a Thanksgiving dinner for her to hear God's love. Plus i had to go to work, walk around work place, go home to take a rest, go to bouna vista for interview, go to work place, then bring her to bt batok. tons of walking, at my worst state.
i thot i was gonna faint or sth. i told the lord, " you can't let me go now....i have to bring someone there today." And....well.....i reached the feast, still aching and tired and sick. everyone ate well and i couldn't!! But the strange and awesome thing was, after all the sharing, the song and the testimony by someone, the aches almost all left me. the only mild one left was the leg muscle ones (the usual). hmm....He is amazing!
Two incidences of physical pain these two weeks woke me up to realise the importance of sincere prayer.
The first was last tues when food poisoning or diarrhoea came with bad cramps ( the girl thing). I was slouched or doubled over on my chair at work, face probably white....and the only thing i could do on the way home (when working hours were not over) was go "God...help." "God, please take away the pain....help."
Then it struck me. The most heartfelt sincere prayers come from our souls or spirits when we're in the most pain or disorientation. That's the kind that we mean with all our hearts. Shouldn't we take that same desperation and sincereness to our daily prayer life?
The second incident of pain was today. I had this strange flu virus or rather, muscle cramp virus that seemed to ache and poke every single muscle i had (arms, legs, belly, neck, shoulders etc etc). And the weird part was there was no sore throat or food poisoning. so why this ache? And the worst part was, i had to take my friend to a Thanksgiving dinner for her to hear God's love. Plus i had to go to work, walk around work place, go home to take a rest, go to bouna vista for interview, go to work place, then bring her to bt batok. tons of walking, at my worst state.
i thot i was gonna faint or sth. i told the lord, " you can't let me go now....i have to bring someone there today." And....well.....i reached the feast, still aching and tired and sick. everyone ate well and i couldn't!! But the strange and awesome thing was, after all the sharing, the song and the testimony by someone, the aches almost all left me. the only mild one left was the leg muscle ones (the usual). hmm....He is amazing!
Thursday, December 4, 2008
learning day
what a learning day even though it was just doing minutes and minutes
Wow, Minutes of a Meeting (aka MOM) aren't easy to do either. especially when u had no clue whatsoever of the train of meetings way months or even one full year before you came into a company. but getting to hear two sides (or more) kinda debate things out on a professional level...but i really think of people in my generation and i go....hmm.....sometimes i wish we'd been thru more.
Haha, and it took more than improvisation like in a drama. Sometimes the best lines come out when you're improvising on an act. Take for instance yesterday at rehearsal. there was this actor who suddenly came up with his own biblical version (or pastorly version) of life. Which were lines that spoke to my current condition or state of mind in life. And boy, were those lines relevant! Can't say them online (or it would spoil the show...come watch it yourself!!) but a hint would be,
It relates to one of my recent prayers made within this month. Not the Jabez prayer.
A prayer which applies to all aspects of life, not one aspect.
That's what i call a "God-word."
Btw, what's a gal to do while she's single?? plenty. basically, it's not as the world says we should be or do. (we gotta see if it's in line with the word, always test the spirit, discern) but the most important thing i feel, is to Grasp what we have now in this season or this season will be over in no time. :P
Wow, Minutes of a Meeting (aka MOM) aren't easy to do either. especially when u had no clue whatsoever of the train of meetings way months or even one full year before you came into a company. but getting to hear two sides (or more) kinda debate things out on a professional level...but i really think of people in my generation and i go....hmm.....sometimes i wish we'd been thru more.
Haha, and it took more than improvisation like in a drama. Sometimes the best lines come out when you're improvising on an act. Take for instance yesterday at rehearsal. there was this actor who suddenly came up with his own biblical version (or pastorly version) of life. Which were lines that spoke to my current condition or state of mind in life. And boy, were those lines relevant! Can't say them online (or it would spoil the show...come watch it yourself!!) but a hint would be,
It relates to one of my recent prayers made within this month. Not the Jabez prayer.
A prayer which applies to all aspects of life, not one aspect.
That's what i call a "God-word."
Btw, what's a gal to do while she's single?? plenty. basically, it's not as the world says we should be or do. (we gotta see if it's in line with the word, always test the spirit, discern) but the most important thing i feel, is to Grasp what we have now in this season or this season will be over in no time. :P
Monday, December 1, 2008
Sunday, November 30, 2008
What a day....
Today i got strict with myself. Time to really do something meaningful and the stuff i usually do for a hobby which makes no sense to most normal people.
Which is to 'go out there' into the most normal places of this world. And, with a purpose. which is to get them coming for this really hip and cool christmas musical....
I definitely met the people i wanted to meet....one whole long table of them. from all different countries, again. Except argh...i didn't get the cambodia gal's number....but there's always a way.
Even though i missed the ntu class outing in the afternoon due to some rehearsal (for a play i'm helping out).....the time to meet another group of people was redeemed at the last moment as i scampered my way to the quay. by the way, even though that was one of the worst salsa clubs i've ever seen, only because i got rejected for one dance, but only once...haha, at least my time was well spent. i do pray and hope to meet my first ntu class....before 17th dec.
Which is to 'go out there' into the most normal places of this world. And, with a purpose. which is to get them coming for this really hip and cool christmas musical....
I definitely met the people i wanted to meet....one whole long table of them. from all different countries, again. Except argh...i didn't get the cambodia gal's number....but there's always a way.
Even though i missed the ntu class outing in the afternoon due to some rehearsal (for a play i'm helping out).....the time to meet another group of people was redeemed at the last moment as i scampered my way to the quay. by the way, even though that was one of the worst salsa clubs i've ever seen, only because i got rejected for one dance, but only once...haha, at least my time was well spent. i do pray and hope to meet my first ntu class....before 17th dec.
Thursday, November 27, 2008
jabez
oopz here's the correct FULL prayer of Jabez in old testament!! :) woohoohoo!! what greattt weekk.......me totally being able to be myself. praise the lorddd..... with freedom comes responsibility
1 Chronicles 4:10 Jabez cried out to the God of Israel, "Oh, that you would bless me and enlarge my territory! Let your hand be with me, and keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain." And God granted his request.
1 Chronicles 4:10 Jabez cried out to the God of Israel, "Oh, that you would bless me and enlarge my territory! Let your hand be with me, and keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain." And God granted his request.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
is it really You?
oK I've got so much so say and so little netisphere to actually talk because i have a lot on my mind. I'm worried about my friend or rather, concerned. then again, i'm concerned about myself too and what steps to take next. honestly, even if i'm interested in the job i'm in, there are doubts. there are always doubts no doubt. in life....sometimes i think , only think, or feel, or it's in my opinion, that you have to take a blind step forward. then let God work. strange because that was a sign or poster i saw today while passing by a company at my workplace. "All our employees take the steps that bring us to success."
And the movie today. i didn't even care if it was lame humor or slapstick (tropic thunder, btw) etc....it was a learning one where all of us learnt sth. like, how in a real life scenario, you don't have your script. the best movies are produced when you actually are thrown (mostly unknowingly or unwillingly) into a real life situation and deal with it with all that you learnt and know and have. that's real, see. no more textbooks or manuals. so here i am......arghh........i gotta talk to this person and that person now about this and that stuff. take more initiative to bring up a conversation about stuff. i know i know i always look bold and stuff but inside i do get scared at times.
And.....the number of coincidental bumpings today (4 girls who were ex schoolmates from different stages in my life)....this is no coincidence.
Ok I know i seem cliche always saying "God help me" or blah blah spiritual or religious stuff but very tough stuff are left with God alone......cos man may not comprehend everything.....i think i'll go and pray. i feel God has been revealing stuff to me these days. not all spiritual or religious all the time but oh well....i'm learning. The verse 'The secret things belong to the Lord makes me really wonder what it means when God said this to Moses this in Deuteronomy 29. Does it mean the secret sins of man or the secret will of the Lord for the future, or the Second coming of Christ? or all the above? only the Lord knows...
And the movie today. i didn't even care if it was lame humor or slapstick (tropic thunder, btw) etc....it was a learning one where all of us learnt sth. like, how in a real life scenario, you don't have your script. the best movies are produced when you actually are thrown (mostly unknowingly or unwillingly) into a real life situation and deal with it with all that you learnt and know and have. that's real, see. no more textbooks or manuals. so here i am......arghh........i gotta talk to this person and that person now about this and that stuff. take more initiative to bring up a conversation about stuff. i know i know i always look bold and stuff but inside i do get scared at times.
And.....the number of coincidental bumpings today (4 girls who were ex schoolmates from different stages in my life)....this is no coincidence.
Ok I know i seem cliche always saying "God help me" or blah blah spiritual or religious stuff but very tough stuff are left with God alone......cos man may not comprehend everything.....i think i'll go and pray. i feel God has been revealing stuff to me these days. not all spiritual or religious all the time but oh well....i'm learning. The verse 'The secret things belong to the Lord makes me really wonder what it means when God said this to Moses this in Deuteronomy 29. Does it mean the secret sins of man or the secret will of the Lord for the future, or the Second coming of Christ? or all the above? only the Lord knows...
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
helping
it was so nice being able to help two people yesterday, one with her new house in settling in in a rented apartment by herself since she's a foreigner. the other was helping a parent raising a 2 year old kid find a job....
Sunday, November 16, 2008
salsa in westmall
its good when your own family volunteers you to go on stage to do a dance with some volunteers......in front of a crowd of people.....but when it really happens.....and they take a video of you, thats quite something eh. well it happened to me today...it was funny though. because all the volunteers who apparently "didn't know how to do basic salsa" were actually pretty "fast learners". lol. well it was fun educating my own family on what salsa is all about. so finally, they get to see that it's pretty cool.
Learnt how to play more frisbee today....man, it got better at a big sacrifice....blue black bumps on my left arm.....then they can go "oh its normal.....very common." made me think hard by just this statement. is it to make me more tough again? just like volleyball in sec school.....i could write a book chapter on the volleyball lessons in sec 2.....
The best part of waiting.....i finally got the song book i wanted and NEARLY bought 3 months ago. "dctalk's greatest hits". it was going for HALF PRICE. patience pays off.
Learnt how to play more frisbee today....man, it got better at a big sacrifice....blue black bumps on my left arm.....then they can go "oh its normal.....very common." made me think hard by just this statement. is it to make me more tough again? just like volleyball in sec school.....i could write a book chapter on the volleyball lessons in sec 2.....
The best part of waiting.....i finally got the song book i wanted and NEARLY bought 3 months ago. "dctalk's greatest hits". it was going for HALF PRICE. patience pays off.
Saturday, November 8, 2008
our gift is our lives
dear lord,
help me to do the right things. say the right things. I leave these crazy romantic thoughts in your hands!!!! u know totally what i'n thinking....hehe....help!!!
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Speaking on career, I would rather the applications not give me an interview or have me out at the first round than after 3-4 rounds then tell me i'm to go.....thankfully, this has not happened (me always being myself and 95% honest all the way). Honesty is the way to go. Tactfulness and sensitivity included i will still be honest. Likewise i wish employers were honest too about their hiring criteria, acceptance rate etc. but that is soo few and far between. it should be a two way thing.
Why would anyone want to hire the make-believe version of me, or the pretended one, or the hiding-things one? And then have to call me into the office 4 to 7 months later and go "Thanks for smoking me in your interview." lol.
For the hidden potential (which i believe i will see) in this current job i have, i will hold on to it. I mean there are pretty nice stuff here i get to observe, like the seniors sharing their working experiences, their paternal advice to you, the manageable scope of work (finally). u never know what God is thinking. His thots are far higher than our thots. People of the bible never knew what strange things they were told or called to do till the whole plan was revealed.
life on earth is fleeting. What we make of our lives is our gift to Him.
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help me to do the right things. say the right things. I leave these crazy romantic thoughts in your hands!!!! u know totally what i'n thinking....hehe....help!!!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Speaking on career, I would rather the applications not give me an interview or have me out at the first round than after 3-4 rounds then tell me i'm to go.....thankfully, this has not happened (me always being myself and 95% honest all the way). Honesty is the way to go. Tactfulness and sensitivity included i will still be honest. Likewise i wish employers were honest too about their hiring criteria, acceptance rate etc. but that is soo few and far between. it should be a two way thing.
Why would anyone want to hire the make-believe version of me, or the pretended one, or the hiding-things one? And then have to call me into the office 4 to 7 months later and go "Thanks for smoking me in your interview." lol.
For the hidden potential (which i believe i will see) in this current job i have, i will hold on to it. I mean there are pretty nice stuff here i get to observe, like the seniors sharing their working experiences, their paternal advice to you, the manageable scope of work (finally). u never know what God is thinking. His thots are far higher than our thots. People of the bible never knew what strange things they were told or called to do till the whole plan was revealed.
life on earth is fleeting. What we make of our lives is our gift to Him.
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Thursday, November 6, 2008
politics (usa elections)
---Yay. Its obama!! (USA elections)---
thotful thoughts
questions on sufficiency. to each his own as the saying goes. but then again.....ok maybe its about getting used to different aspects of life.
elections. finally the world heaves a sigh of relief along with america. the tension is over. a new tension that breathes "whoa, let's see what lies ahead" arriveth.
a job or career. either way its temporary. it's prob either short-term or long-term.
thotful thoughts
questions on sufficiency. to each his own as the saying goes. but then again.....ok maybe its about getting used to different aspects of life.
elections. finally the world heaves a sigh of relief along with america. the tension is over. a new tension that breathes "whoa, let's see what lies ahead" arriveth.
a job or career. either way its temporary. it's prob either short-term or long-term.
Friday, October 31, 2008
prisons interview
i am excited and anxious about the outcome. either way...it will be in the sense "casting lots". just like what they did in the bible. i pray God speaks thru the results. i was totally, ok 95% honest throughout.
What about the customer service for the international school...hmm....nahhh. the pros are the environment, people-orientedness, freedom, short fixed working hours. the cons? job satisfaction would be 60%. because these are kids well provided for. the salary is one practical concern.
thing about the temp job is this. i could make it permanent. (was offered). but what on earth is my scope or speciality there? yet to be defined.... again. patience? maybe. should i be honest with them about my dream job? sighhh......should i agree to be permanent based on what i see in just two weeks only? i don't think so. (based on experience). But i can't keep on like this....:P
Whatever the outcome, i know that God keeps His promises...And today the Lord speaketh while i jog.
Don't see so much of the bad side of things to miss out on the blessings that come with it. thing is, i got to meet and talk to a burmese chap (younger than me, 21) who was looking for a church in singapore. he's only here 2 months. whole family not saved except him....was playing nice christian songs at his backyard. so i invited him for services.
What about the customer service for the international school...hmm....nahhh. the pros are the environment, people-orientedness, freedom, short fixed working hours. the cons? job satisfaction would be 60%. because these are kids well provided for. the salary is one practical concern.
thing about the temp job is this. i could make it permanent. (was offered). but what on earth is my scope or speciality there? yet to be defined.... again. patience? maybe. should i be honest with them about my dream job? sighhh......should i agree to be permanent based on what i see in just two weeks only? i don't think so. (based on experience). But i can't keep on like this....:P
Whatever the outcome, i know that God keeps His promises...And today the Lord speaketh while i jog.
Don't see so much of the bad side of things to miss out on the blessings that come with it. thing is, i got to meet and talk to a burmese chap (younger than me, 21) who was looking for a church in singapore. he's only here 2 months. whole family not saved except him....was playing nice christian songs at his backyard. so i invited him for services.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
freewill
this time with job decisions.....mainly.
Had a really scary dream last night and i'm pretty sure it was the Lord telling me stuff about Himself. Usually its about stuff i'm facing like people or decisions i'm making or what I've been thinking of, but this time it was about Himself. God has emotions. I was like "Ok, this is freakily amazing". HE is freakily amazing. (in two words) if there were more words i could go on and on and on and .....the song "Indescribable" (chris tomlin) makes sense. that speaks of creation. this was God Himself being so like us.
Reading thru a book "Hearing God's voice" by Henry Blackaby now. It speaks of the different ways God uses to speak to us mere man....ok not mere, after all we are made in His image. but the ways he spoke was different in the Old and New testament.
Some of my cell group were debating on the free will of God today. like, did He create us like Him, with Free will because He too has Free will? One of the girls suggested He gave us free will because He wanted the relationship with us and not a robot who always agrees with him. How about this: why can't He forgive us ALL if He were so good? It's because of sin that already cuts us off from a holy God. So by right, everyone is cast away from Him due to the fall of man. So the gift was Salvation through one man - who was all God yet all man - Jesus. that's where free will comes in. to take the gift of love or reject it. BUT What about people who did not have a chance to hear the gospel/good news? are they cast away? that is yet to be answered, a mystery...
Had a really scary dream last night and i'm pretty sure it was the Lord telling me stuff about Himself. Usually its about stuff i'm facing like people or decisions i'm making or what I've been thinking of, but this time it was about Himself. God has emotions. I was like "Ok, this is freakily amazing". HE is freakily amazing. (in two words) if there were more words i could go on and on and on and .....the song "Indescribable" (chris tomlin) makes sense. that speaks of creation. this was God Himself being so like us.
Reading thru a book "Hearing God's voice" by Henry Blackaby now. It speaks of the different ways God uses to speak to us mere man....ok not mere, after all we are made in His image. but the ways he spoke was different in the Old and New testament.
Some of my cell group were debating on the free will of God today. like, did He create us like Him, with Free will because He too has Free will? One of the girls suggested He gave us free will because He wanted the relationship with us and not a robot who always agrees with him. How about this: why can't He forgive us ALL if He were so good? It's because of sin that already cuts us off from a holy God. So by right, everyone is cast away from Him due to the fall of man. So the gift was Salvation through one man - who was all God yet all man - Jesus. that's where free will comes in. to take the gift of love or reject it. BUT What about people who did not have a chance to hear the gospel/good news? are they cast away? that is yet to be answered, a mystery...
Thursday, October 16, 2008
postponing decision making
Making major and minor decisions are all nice things to do as it shows growing up.
but its freaky as in.....the wrong step could just mean a painful few months (which could be another character growth period) or it could be the step to WHERE exactly you ought to go, in the right direction. So either way you still get to where you should be but its a matter of time and all that. Either way, I'm just gonna be sure i am staying in the palm of God's hand. how to ensure that is to put Him in the centre of my life. and a lot more things but.......well check with the Word on your own....
but its freaky as in.....the wrong step could just mean a painful few months (which could be another character growth period) or it could be the step to WHERE exactly you ought to go, in the right direction. So either way you still get to where you should be but its a matter of time and all that. Either way, I'm just gonna be sure i am staying in the palm of God's hand. how to ensure that is to put Him in the centre of my life. and a lot more things but.......well check with the Word on your own....
Monday, October 13, 2008
birthdaysss
what a "happening" weekend...as everyone can see, (whoever who bothers reading this blog...lol) happening is in inverted commas. so this weekend was nice and all but yea its probably time for me to take stock of each outing i have and really treasure every outing.
Sat......hmm......dance class then the chat with a new friend called Miss H who is only 22 years old in singapore for a year....exploring religions....hmm.....then came the bbq.....and lotsa games.....haha. great food......sat afternoon was a time i really reflected just like every other day this whole entire week! i mean, i'm trying to get real....in many senses of the word. get real about life, get real about what i want, get real about my purposes. am i that bad? seriously? i don't think so...
Sundaee...Played frisbee in the afternoon!! its a bit like rugby or captainsball....at west coast park with some old sch friends and their church frenz. except its a lot harder to catch the frisbee.
had a cool birthday celebration for arlene.....ended up we the celebrators had more fun haha.....isn't it always the case? like when you bless others, you feel even more blessed being the giver or blesser.
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
salsa diaries
Tues night
(lol some personal stuff not work) i am embarrassed. highly embarrassed. but i will smile thru this. oh man.....
(about work) it may be a "presentation only" to some this thurs but for me it's gonna be scarryyy...
Wed night
Additional stresses from people...and leaving my book behind....whoa (how laughable can this get)
Thurs
(about both stresses) I was right......"all is bearable" is real. deep down, there is a nice side to every one....work got bit more ok too.
i am writing two totally separate matters in the same blog because it all relates to some negative emotions (at the start) which was sorted out later. and all via talking to Him. (plus all in the same week) Cast all your burdens on Him lah.... do not be anxious la.....and the perfect peace which transcends all understanding will keep your hearts and minds in Jesus.
(lol some personal stuff not work) i am embarrassed. highly embarrassed. but i will smile thru this. oh man.....
(about work) it may be a "presentation only" to some this thurs but for me it's gonna be scarryyy...
Wed night
Additional stresses from people...and leaving my book behind....whoa (how laughable can this get)
Thurs
(about both stresses) I was right......"all is bearable" is real. deep down, there is a nice side to every one....work got bit more ok too.
i am writing two totally separate matters in the same blog because it all relates to some negative emotions (at the start) which was sorted out later. and all via talking to Him. (plus all in the same week) Cast all your burdens on Him lah.... do not be anxious la.....and the perfect peace which transcends all understanding will keep your hearts and minds in Jesus.
Sunday, October 5, 2008
all is bearable. looking at it with agape love?
people and situations are bearable and can be fun, even the most 'interesting' people.
IF only life were about no irritations, no pain and no difficult people....but this would be ideal and just not real!! on top of all these, there's W-O-R-K to deal with, friendships, etc. And it could get to the point u wanna go, "To solve all the problems, either say YES to everything and everyone or say NO to everything and everyone." like in the show Bruce Almighty. By the way, his clicking on "Yes to all" turned out to be a disaster.
It's not that i'm not a serious person. It's just 'Why punish yourself for a bad circumstance or outcome in which you've put in effort or tried your best already intentionally'. Given you really have tried your best already.
Besides we have this unconditional and AGAPE (same meaning) love who is HE (God) demonstrating his love for us through Jesus, on the cross. yes, death by the cross. I'm not saying i'm taking that as a safety net and like not doing my best in life. But like i mentioned, i try (and still do) my best intentionally and in everything, I'm accountable to God, not man.
Who would have chosen such a cruel punishment like the cross to die upon? Or go around claiming he was God's son? He must have been either a lunatic or a liar to go around with such a big claim.
Finally, i had fun hanging out with some random cell group after the youth service lol. haha....it was "ok this group seems fun" then i stuck around them for dinner....and proceeded to holland v. where we had laughing riots about the slightest joke
IF only life were about no irritations, no pain and no difficult people....but this would be ideal and just not real!! on top of all these, there's W-O-R-K to deal with, friendships, etc. And it could get to the point u wanna go, "To solve all the problems, either say YES to everything and everyone or say NO to everything and everyone." like in the show Bruce Almighty. By the way, his clicking on "Yes to all" turned out to be a disaster.
It's not that i'm not a serious person. It's just 'Why punish yourself for a bad circumstance or outcome in which you've put in effort or tried your best already intentionally'. Given you really have tried your best already.
Besides we have this unconditional and AGAPE (same meaning) love who is HE (God) demonstrating his love for us through Jesus, on the cross. yes, death by the cross. I'm not saying i'm taking that as a safety net and like not doing my best in life. But like i mentioned, i try (and still do) my best intentionally and in everything, I'm accountable to God, not man.
Who would have chosen such a cruel punishment like the cross to die upon? Or go around claiming he was God's son? He must have been either a lunatic or a liar to go around with such a big claim.
Finally, i had fun hanging out with some random cell group after the youth service lol. haha....it was "ok this group seems fun" then i stuck around them for dinner....and proceeded to holland v. where we had laughing riots about the slightest joke
Monday, September 29, 2008
missing sermon :(
Hallelujah.....
i totally missed the service today....because i didn't know that helping out meant not getting a glimpse of service at all. anyway i had a free sermon at lunch at coos (from a senior guy with moustache). so did the rest of the 5 young people at the table. from one of the youth workers. was a refreshing break from serving. but serving was cool too.
i totally missed the service today....because i didn't know that helping out meant not getting a glimpse of service at all. anyway i had a free sermon at lunch at coos (from a senior guy with moustache). so did the rest of the 5 young people at the table. from one of the youth workers. was a refreshing break from serving. but serving was cool too.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
salsa
.wherever i am placed.
Have you ever been in this state of being simply satisfied with the way things are at the moment....even if it's like not doing anything new, starting anything great or meeting new groups of friends?
It is probably a combination of complacency (haha), contentment or just totally trusting God, enjoying being a spectator and of course, not taking all the programmes and people you've started for granted. In a way it's called "Keeping inventory and taking stock", mending the fences, tending a garden...
Then you will have the time to take a deep breath, look around and really observe or notice the faces around you, who are soo interesting even if they don't think they're that fantastic.
The saying goes "Bloom wherever you are planted", or another one "Do whatever u can, with whatever you have, wherever you are".
I got to capture dance in its purest form at the dance hang out today. Maybe it was really my own perception this time really observing people. There was a whole gang from NTU who came down and were practising with their instructor. hahaha. their moves weren't so pro but they were all so cute! It was really cool watching those who truly appreciated it versus those who just danced to have fun (that's good too), versus those who danced to look good (a.k.a show off lol), or danced to socialise....etc. Talking to people who actually go the extra mile in really pursuing it professionally made the difference too.
Have you ever been in this state of being simply satisfied with the way things are at the moment....even if it's like not doing anything new, starting anything great or meeting new groups of friends?
It is probably a combination of complacency (haha), contentment or just totally trusting God, enjoying being a spectator and of course, not taking all the programmes and people you've started for granted. In a way it's called "Keeping inventory and taking stock", mending the fences, tending a garden...
Then you will have the time to take a deep breath, look around and really observe or notice the faces around you, who are soo interesting even if they don't think they're that fantastic.
The saying goes "Bloom wherever you are planted", or another one "Do whatever u can, with whatever you have, wherever you are".
I got to capture dance in its purest form at the dance hang out today. Maybe it was really my own perception this time really observing people. There was a whole gang from NTU who came down and were practising with their instructor. hahaha. their moves weren't so pro but they were all so cute! It was really cool watching those who truly appreciated it versus those who just danced to have fun (that's good too), versus those who danced to look good (a.k.a show off lol), or danced to socialise....etc. Talking to people who actually go the extra mile in really pursuing it professionally made the difference too.
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
atonement
It is the time of the day again.
Peace and quiet.
Whew?
Haha, yes and no.
Sometimes i really wonder if life has become a routine for people in general. like "oh if i don't go to work, man!! I feel weird!" "If i don't clock in 9 hours of work, it feels strange." and even when they don't have to work, they want to, simply because.....we're conditioned to become creatures of habit? or routine?
Oh well...i'd love to go on talking about how amazed i am that Christ atoned for our sins.
If we explored the various ideologies and theologies in this world....the thing that differentiates them is probably, the atonement for sin part.
Man knows he sins. Man knows he is a sinner and is in need of a bigger God. So its the sins part that he has to deal with.....to be continued......
Peace and quiet.
Whew?
Haha, yes and no.
Sometimes i really wonder if life has become a routine for people in general. like "oh if i don't go to work, man!! I feel weird!" "If i don't clock in 9 hours of work, it feels strange." and even when they don't have to work, they want to, simply because.....we're conditioned to become creatures of habit? or routine?
Oh well...i'd love to go on talking about how amazed i am that Christ atoned for our sins.
If we explored the various ideologies and theologies in this world....the thing that differentiates them is probably, the atonement for sin part.
Man knows he sins. Man knows he is a sinner and is in need of a bigger God. So its the sins part that he has to deal with.....to be continued......
Friday, September 12, 2008
work people
Ahem, i forgot to mention, the benefits of dealing with PEOPLE on a daily basis. here goes:
1) Iron sharpens iron, so likewise, even if you find them difficult, dealing with them make you tougher.
2) you gain 'the experience of life' by dealing with them........on a daily basis especially :P
3) even if its a one-off event where you wanna slap people, lol, but you didn't, you have practiced self control and patience. qualities that add to character. yay.
4) if you can handle your parents or your relatives sweetly, you can handle ANYone.
5) make #4 apply ALSO to difficult people. you will see the rewards.
6) you will appreciate people who are NICE more. and love them more.
1) Iron sharpens iron, so likewise, even if you find them difficult, dealing with them make you tougher.
2) you gain 'the experience of life' by dealing with them........on a daily basis especially :P
3) even if its a one-off event where you wanna slap people, lol, but you didn't, you have practiced self control and patience. qualities that add to character. yay.
4) if you can handle your parents or your relatives sweetly, you can handle ANYone.
5) make #4 apply ALSO to difficult people. you will see the rewards.
6) you will appreciate people who are NICE more. and love them more.
Sunday, September 7, 2008
guys lead, girls follow? (is that biblical?)
"Girls! keep your steps small...otherwise the guys will find it impossible to lead!"
alritey.....here am i again! look world, here comes kimbarley......lol.
it was an awesome time at dance class with miss.....lavina today. she was totally enigmatic (does such a word exist??). and she made the whole class laugh and.....(get this) Unite! Mr Gibson (or Gupson) (another funny teacher) was absent today so miss (forgot her name) took his place. i relate better i realized, with female or maybe its just how good she was! yeppers.....the guys were actually doing their counting properly. the gals were pretty.....chummy and loud today.
alritey.....here am i again! look world, here comes kimbarley......lol.
it was an awesome time at dance class with miss.....lavina today. she was totally enigmatic (does such a word exist??). and she made the whole class laugh and.....(get this) Unite! Mr Gibson (or Gupson) (another funny teacher) was absent today so miss (forgot her name) took his place. i relate better i realized, with female or maybe its just how good she was! yeppers.....the guys were actually doing their counting properly. the gals were pretty.....chummy and loud today.
Saturday, September 6, 2008
meeting overseas frens at little india
here's to feeling happy, sad and nostalgic.
(went down with overseas and and local friends to eat at little india today...friday!)
.What a Week! interesting meeting overseas friends, yet sad to have them leave and a little irritated (sth else).
I have to say though, i realised how extroverted and overly outgoing i can be. not that its that bad...maybe it is. maybe it is. because dealing with people with no clear purpose can be irritating. and not to mention tiring and exasperating. if you don't even know why you keep mixing with people, even difficult ones. who totally irritate u. Jesus tells us to love our neighbour (people) but...the other verse also speaks of "being wise as serpents and gentle as doves". so CHOOSE wisely who u really deal with or share with. or things might get worse
(went down with overseas and and local friends to eat at little india today...friday!)
.What a Week! interesting meeting overseas friends, yet sad to have them leave and a little irritated (sth else).
I have to say though, i realised how extroverted and overly outgoing i can be. not that its that bad...maybe it is. maybe it is. because dealing with people with no clear purpose can be irritating. and not to mention tiring and exasperating. if you don't even know why you keep mixing with people, even difficult ones. who totally irritate u. Jesus tells us to love our neighbour (people) but...the other verse also speaks of "being wise as serpents and gentle as doves". so CHOOSE wisely who u really deal with or share with. or things might get worse
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
grace verses
The environment around me (everyone around at work, ok 70%) is giving me good reason and good motivation to actually....
talk more to Jesus and get into the Word.
seriously.
And i'm really thankful for this chance....of more peace at work, more focus, a whole season (prob about 30 days)...and a Word-plunge (bible)........"Here i come, WORD!!"
16May our Lord Jesus Christ himself and God our Father, who loved us and by his grace gave us eternal encouragement and good hope, 17encourage your hearts and strengthen you in every good deed and word.
6Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. 7If you really knew me, you would know my Father as well.
(the message version)
talk more to Jesus and get into the Word.
seriously.
And i'm really thankful for this chance....of more peace at work, more focus, a whole season (prob about 30 days)...and a Word-plunge (bible)........"Here i come, WORD!!"
16May our Lord Jesus Christ himself and God our Father, who loved us and by his grace gave us eternal encouragement and good hope, 17encourage your hearts and strengthen you in every good deed and word.
6Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. 7If you really knew me, you would know my Father as well.
(the message version)
Saturday, August 30, 2008
commit to community service
if only i could get to a point where i can be committed to community service. i know it's a crazy thought. i just hope singapore will be where it's a peer pressure thing and everyone around (at least 60% people around my age) finds it common to help the needy and poor. and on a more frequent basis. then it wont be so "weird" for me or "having intertia" when i want to help on a more constant basis. hmm.......organise a group or find people with the same interest? lol. i hope.
Talking to a lecturer from Brown university today at the hospital....who was more than 70 years of age....(i was just visiting a friend at hospital and he was in the neighbouring hospital bed). He was like "To enter some ivy-league universities you need to be committed to community service", and i was like, "hey we should have that too.....in singapore!" that would be serious motivation man. for all the jcs and polys.....whoa. haha......at least the action of doing the right thing would be right....even though the motive could be wrong...
Oh well there he was, despite having just undergone surgery, just giving a free lecture on history and religion....and well, he being jewish, there was a whole lotta updates about his latest research and readings into the latest research. and onto his fascinating life....i mean call it strange or whatever, but his life was actually fascinating to listen about. like how he got married at what, 50 yrs old (whoever heard of that in usa.....stats usually show a much lower range...but oh well. he's happy!). how he was arab yet believed in judaism....moved to usa at age 10.....hearing about the talmud and the dead sea scrolls....etc etc etc......
Talking to a lecturer from Brown university today at the hospital....who was more than 70 years of age....(i was just visiting a friend at hospital and he was in the neighbouring hospital bed). He was like "To enter some ivy-league universities you need to be committed to community service", and i was like, "hey we should have that too.....in singapore!" that would be serious motivation man. for all the jcs and polys.....whoa. haha......at least the action of doing the right thing would be right....even though the motive could be wrong...
Oh well there he was, despite having just undergone surgery, just giving a free lecture on history and religion....and well, he being jewish, there was a whole lotta updates about his latest research and readings into the latest research. and onto his fascinating life....i mean call it strange or whatever, but his life was actually fascinating to listen about. like how he got married at what, 50 yrs old (whoever heard of that in usa.....stats usually show a much lower range...but oh well. he's happy!). how he was arab yet believed in judaism....moved to usa at age 10.....hearing about the talmud and the dead sea scrolls....etc etc etc......
dance or not?
First.....i've finally mustered basic footwork for my salsa.....
but when it's too fast at the turns.......no........not at that turning stages....yet.
I've met up with old friends this week and adapting to the new room in the office....with a new supervisor. I get a new supervisor every two weeks!
but when it's too fast at the turns.......no........not at that turning stages....yet.
I've met up with old friends this week and adapting to the new room in the office....with a new supervisor. I get a new supervisor every two weeks!
Saturday, August 23, 2008
For Him and By Him
Man are created For Him and By Him
"Wow" is one word i would say if i were to wrap up the brief but intriguing conference i attended at my own church recently. It dealt with deep research on the topic of Sound and DNA (How God used the sound of His voice to create our individual DNAs and how in USA, people's DNA were transmitted into a song using technology. And guess what? Every person's DNA was a different SONG! amazing.
Today's one.....wow again.....though i came really late, catching only the last 10 min of his sermon....the moment i stepped into the place.....i felt the uplifting presence of God, not just seen on people's faces and attitudes (later...every one was somewhat more joyful and positive) but i think i missed some very good minutes of the sermon and worship!! (according to others). oh well......it just goes to show God is big enough to transform any situation, place, or heart....in a matter of minutes or hours(!!)
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Process is more important than result
tuesday at tues group i Listened to a good sharing of the word "process".
in summary:
The world's greatest people who invented / changed mankind / achieved big exploits, were people who were childhood or youth failures. Take a look at Bill gates (dropped out of harvard), Tiger Woods (he wasn't fantastic as a youth or kid), Einstein (dropped out of school).....
the common thing about them?
They had to go through a PROCESS......of learning. Tiger woods' father used to praise him on his golf, not for his scoring but rather whenever his process of learning to hit the ball was right.
"Wow" is one word i would say if i were to wrap up the brief but intriguing conference i attended at my own church recently. It dealt with deep research on the topic of Sound and DNA (How God used the sound of His voice to create our individual DNAs and how in USA, people's DNA were transmitted into a song using technology. And guess what? Every person's DNA was a different SONG! amazing.
Today's one.....wow again.....though i came really late, catching only the last 10 min of his sermon....the moment i stepped into the place.....i felt the uplifting presence of God, not just seen on people's faces and attitudes (later...every one was somewhat more joyful and positive) but i think i missed some very good minutes of the sermon and worship!! (according to others). oh well......it just goes to show God is big enough to transform any situation, place, or heart....in a matter of minutes or hours(!!)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Process is more important than result
tuesday at tues group i Listened to a good sharing of the word "process".
in summary:
The world's greatest people who invented / changed mankind / achieved big exploits, were people who were childhood or youth failures. Take a look at Bill gates (dropped out of harvard), Tiger Woods (he wasn't fantastic as a youth or kid), Einstein (dropped out of school).....
the common thing about them?
They had to go through a PROCESS......of learning. Tiger woods' father used to praise him on his golf, not for his scoring but rather whenever his process of learning to hit the ball was right.
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
clown in the office
Thankfulness
I thank God once again for cheering me up when i had sore throat and runny nose today. (about 2 other people in my office had mouth ulcers for a few days, worse!) it could be we talk too aggressively or too much (while working). hahahaha.....i wonder how this kinda bacteria spreads by air and talking. ....anyway While i thought i was gonna have a bout of flu or something today, the usual clowns came to our office room and cheered all of us up.
i couldn't help it but was shaking with laughter.....i didn't wanna reveal i was laughing so hard. then my 'supervisor' saw me shaking (from hiding my giggling) she started giggling too.....then i couldn't control already and just burst out "hahahahha......" and after laughing 7 min straight, the effect wasn't gone and we all just couldn't really laugh much again. =p
I thank God once again for cheering me up when i had sore throat and runny nose today. (about 2 other people in my office had mouth ulcers for a few days, worse!) it could be we talk too aggressively or too much (while working). hahahaha.....i wonder how this kinda bacteria spreads by air and talking. ....anyway While i thought i was gonna have a bout of flu or something today, the usual clowns came to our office room and cheered all of us up.
i couldn't help it but was shaking with laughter.....i didn't wanna reveal i was laughing so hard. then my 'supervisor' saw me shaking (from hiding my giggling) she started giggling too.....then i couldn't control already and just burst out "hahahahha......" and after laughing 7 min straight, the effect wasn't gone and we all just couldn't really laugh much again. =p
Saturday, August 2, 2008
festival of praise 2008
"I long to speak to you, into YOUR life. not just into 'others' or 'other people'."
Today marks a serious day in my life (as of 2008) where i seriously connected with God. and am very convicted and sure of it.
I wasn't alone though.....after the word was preached, the thousands around me (20 000?) at the Singapore Indoor Stadium were also in deep prayer, some arms raised, some hands to their hearts, some heads bowed, some whispering to Him.....and connecting heart to heart with their God.....our God.Today marks a serious day in my life (as of 2008) where i seriously connected with God. and am very convicted and sure of it.
When i gazed around at the masses, no one was looking at all, everyone were just eyes-closed, totally engaged, engrossed in the connection or conversation, heart to heart. then i had this strange thought suddenly, "hey it's not just about others. God wants to talk to ME."
then i felt sooo strongly and saw with my own eyes around me (the people connecting) that it was a "God LONGS to connect with the people he made...not just 'wants' but 'longs to'.
So yea i flowed with the crowd (Thank God for good peer pressure) and there and then, spoke my heart out to God and heard Him then He seemed to reveal this flashback...about my recent East Asia trip.............
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Thursday, July 24, 2008
salsa 1
midweek crisis, one may call it but the truth is i need the break from work and all those mugging. so here i had the break of my life (for the week), dancin.....i need that physical activity for 1) endorphins keeps people more cheerful and alert, 2) exercise helps relax the mind.
admittedly the thinking and problems solving does stimulate the mind a lot, and makes one think on the ball, but the mental break is also good like jogging and dancing. so here it was today.
I just hope and pray that all the things i've learnt is retained.......heh heh......my vocabulary has also improved by the leaps and bounds......in the bad way....lol.
admittedly the thinking and problems solving does stimulate the mind a lot, and makes one think on the ball, but the mental break is also good like jogging and dancing. so here it was today.
I just hope and pray that all the things i've learnt is retained.......heh heh......my vocabulary has also improved by the leaps and bounds......in the bad way....lol.
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
wounds of the heart
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grant us patience to see your deeper purposes
Even if we do not get to go to the place we really wanted to go at first, God has a greater purpose and this i know as i've experienced it firsthand. The lord knows which place and time he calls each individual who truly loves Him. and i've seen God open a wide door and sometimes windows for me time and time again he closes the door that i thought was definitely the door for me. Thank you Jesus for the new marine oil and gas job. It's great.
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counselling people
at tuesday group, one where i go on tuesdays (duh), a girl spoke to me saying she actually got hurt ministering to other girls. that's so real. and those that get hurt are the people who do the most reaching out to wounded ones. as the wounded ones are those with the issues. with the "i got so much hurt and anger i gotta take out my anger at someone" kinda thing. and the lord sees and knows. but the lord judges the heart and not so much the words. =)
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grant us patience to see your deeper purposes
Even if we do not get to go to the place we really wanted to go at first, God has a greater purpose and this i know as i've experienced it firsthand. The lord knows which place and time he calls each individual who truly loves Him. and i've seen God open a wide door and sometimes windows for me time and time again he closes the door that i thought was definitely the door for me. Thank you Jesus for the new marine oil and gas job. It's great.
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counselling people
at tuesday group, one where i go on tuesdays (duh), a girl spoke to me saying she actually got hurt ministering to other girls. that's so real. and those that get hurt are the people who do the most reaching out to wounded ones. as the wounded ones are those with the issues. with the "i got so much hurt and anger i gotta take out my anger at someone" kinda thing. and the lord sees and knows. but the lord judges the heart and not so much the words. =)
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Monday, July 7, 2008
every aspect
Dear God,
help me to er, look at every aspect of my life.
and help me not look at the various aspects of others' lives. :P
help me make the right decision this week........arghhh......(exciting but scary)!!
3pm. (tues)
The call came and yeppers...i was selected for the job that i wanted.
Hmm....
Dios de bendigo
Chubok kamneeda.
help me to er, look at every aspect of my life.
and help me not look at the various aspects of others' lives. :P
help me make the right decision this week........arghhh......(exciting but scary)!!
3pm. (tues)
The call came and yeppers...i was selected for the job that i wanted.
Hmm....
Dios de bendigo
Chubok kamneeda.
Friday, July 4, 2008
choosing the same INDUSTRY
Yes, No, Maybe....Finally!
This is totally wonderful....despite me thinking my career path was doing downhill, which WAS, as i was stuck in a very uncomfortable situation. i 100% thought i was going to china for 1 year so i turned down 2 job opportunities. but the trip turned out to be postponed to next year (the one year trip). so there went my 2 initial job offers. (yea, totally sucked.)
But now, i got back on track. and now, i really know what i want to do. what i really want to do, is be good and committed and enjoying what i'm already doing, and yea...!!! i have another chance at this in the Same industry. I don't wanna switch industries so fast. not for 2 years at least. minimum. I have to mentally sign this contract in my brain..... heh. :)
But it's been surprising, as people actually spoke encouragements that seemed to come from God to me on sunday.
like one lady said, "Oh, sometimes you don't see why this happened. but After the situation, you'll see why it happened."
This is totally wonderful....despite me thinking my career path was doing downhill, which WAS, as i was stuck in a very uncomfortable situation. i 100% thought i was going to china for 1 year so i turned down 2 job opportunities. but the trip turned out to be postponed to next year (the one year trip). so there went my 2 initial job offers. (yea, totally sucked.)
But now, i got back on track. and now, i really know what i want to do. what i really want to do, is be good and committed and enjoying what i'm already doing, and yea...!!! i have another chance at this in the Same industry. I don't wanna switch industries so fast. not for 2 years at least. minimum. I have to mentally sign this contract in my brain..... heh. :)
But it's been surprising, as people actually spoke encouragements that seemed to come from God to me on sunday.
like one lady said, "Oh, sometimes you don't see why this happened. but After the situation, you'll see why it happened."
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
have you ever prayed one of those prayers,
and it got answered?
And instead of "Wow" you feel "Ow"?
Heh.
The career path
People talk about the path to "true love" being difficult. I tell you, the path to Career-knowing-cum loving is even worse.
First, KNOWing what you really want and are-able-to-be-trained-in.
It's not that the ability is there or not there, it's knowing if you can be trained in that area. Passion is a major factor;
I ask myself,
"Am i able to want to keep on learning in this industry?"
"Do i fall asleep reading books on it?"
Third and most realistic is this, Imagine this scenario:
You thought this industry was the best, then u had some roadblocks or difficulty that irritates and discourages you. A situation sometimes comes when u are not yourself for a few days.
Colleagues or bosses stop to ask, "Hey, you look troubled?"
Is the passion and commitment to the job enough to make you go on?
Will you still want to solve the problem?
Will you still see the bad part as "temporary"?
Will you try to get things in order and straightened out?
Will you still want to hear from your bosses and colleagues for truthful feedback (a good sign to show you still believe in the job and in them)?
Will you still like the good points of the job, still want to get on with the next task in the job?
if it is all a yes....great! i desperately WANT this job. (but i was listening to this marriage talk once and they said the same questions apply to married couples.)
and it got answered?
And instead of "Wow" you feel "Ow"?
Heh.
The career path
People talk about the path to "true love" being difficult. I tell you, the path to Career-knowing-cum loving is even worse.
First, KNOWing what you really want and are-able-to-be-trained-in.
It's not that the ability is there or not there, it's knowing if you can be trained in that area. Passion is a major factor;
I ask myself,
"Am i able to want to keep on learning in this industry?"
"Do i fall asleep reading books on it?"
Third and most realistic is this, Imagine this scenario:
You thought this industry was the best, then u had some roadblocks or difficulty that irritates and discourages you. A situation sometimes comes when u are not yourself for a few days.
Colleagues or bosses stop to ask, "Hey, you look troubled?"
Is the passion and commitment to the job enough to make you go on?
Will you still want to solve the problem?
Will you still see the bad part as "temporary"?
Will you try to get things in order and straightened out?
Will you still want to hear from your bosses and colleagues for truthful feedback (a good sign to show you still believe in the job and in them)?
Will you still like the good points of the job, still want to get on with the next task in the job?
if it is all a yes....great! i desperately WANT this job. (but i was listening to this marriage talk once and they said the same questions apply to married couples.)
Saturday, June 14, 2008
melbourning
It's been two days in the surburban area of Melbourne and now the 2nd night living with these hosts and they're extravagant givers, and unto God, shown by loving their fellow man. Ok my family and i have had treats at expensive restaurants, free lunches, our first meal was 2.5 roasted chickens and salads....and we're living in their HOUSE!! 3 rooms to our family. Free chauffeur-driven cars even. by the hosts of course.
I've been getting my hands on the books i've always wanted also....at a cheaper price here!! books that are not sold in singapore at christian bookstores like Word and Koorang.
It's cool to see how international Melbourne is, it's even said to be the most international city in the world and i won't be surprised that's true. From Chinese to Koreans to Indians to Jews to Europeans to Brazilians to Indonesians to Japanese to mainland Chinese to Pakistanis, and finally native Australians, this place practically invites every nation for almost any career.
I've been getting my hands on the books i've always wanted also....at a cheaper price here!! books that are not sold in singapore at christian bookstores like Word and Koorang.
It's cool to see how international Melbourne is, it's even said to be the most international city in the world and i won't be surprised that's true. From Chinese to Koreans to Indians to Jews to Europeans to Brazilians to Indonesians to Japanese to mainland Chinese to Pakistanis, and finally native Australians, this place practically invites every nation for almost any career.
Thursday, June 12, 2008
the start of the holiday
Here I am in the heart of South Australia having some form of diarrhoea....yet i know for sure its definitely the rich and good food plus eating too much. lol. :)
Still, nothing beats Sg's local food..... :( and although everything from the food to the natural scenery here is great, it is also not free at all, and the more i live here....the more i miss Asian street.
Here I am in the heart of South Australia having some form of diarrhoea....yet i know for sure its definitely the rich and good food plus eating too much. lol. :)
Still, nothing beats Sg's local food..... :( and although everything from the food to the natural scenery here is great, it is also not free at all, and the more i live here....the more i miss Asian street.
Saturday, June 7, 2008
counting the cost
situation apprehensive
good things can come my way and yet i'm apprehensive because again, the cost has to be counted. and weighed. and the priorities have to be re-weighed. the basic principles too. that's when facts in the head are applied. there ain't use if truths remain as head knowledge and not applied, right? right. gulp.
people
are sooo interesting. some seem much too open, some are just...so chatty only in certain avenues. if i could be who i really really am on the blog as when i'm face to face with someone.......or worse, a group of people who don't know me well....hmm....interesting.
good things can come my way and yet i'm apprehensive because again, the cost has to be counted. and weighed. and the priorities have to be re-weighed. the basic principles too. that's when facts in the head are applied. there ain't use if truths remain as head knowledge and not applied, right? right. gulp.
people
are sooo interesting. some seem much too open, some are just...so chatty only in certain avenues. if i could be who i really really am on the blog as when i'm face to face with someone.......or worse, a group of people who don't know me well....hmm....interesting.
Thursday, May 29, 2008
recognise God's voice
the human brain. we're so creative when we're the tiredest.. btw, it's proven scientifically.
met a bunch of really cool ywamers at the group yesterday. what day was yesterday? yea, so we prayed; i prayed for some of them and them for me. it was nice. and they shared their stories. like how they could see dad's hand on their lives despite initial setbacks etc. sometimes a setback means dad's bigger plan. soo.....is this why my decisions this year are all on hold?
mondae was this SOLEAD Graduation ceremony for some of my friends from ntu. it was nice realising all of us have grown since we were still studying in sch. in maturity i mean. and oh yea, the best part if the juniors didn't forget me....is that good or bad?!
Saturday, May 24, 2008
sichuan earthquake 2008
crazy week but am energized
1) catching the movie "Made of Honor". Set in new york or place that looks like it. hmm, this show made me think again. Not in that soppy way but....."huh?" poor guy!!2) thankfully Kat brought me to see our friend's parent at the hospital this week who had bad fall.
3) overnight prayer on Sun 11pm to Mon 6am - for the nations injured. Tues morning news on papers came that doors have been open, as help had been accepted by leaders of one of the countries.
4) I just love The Message version of the Biblia (bible in spanish). catching the routine perspective of the Book can get tiring (sometimes). Seriously, Eugene Paterson should be praised for doing up The Message version. Take a look:
Isaiah 1: 2-4
The ox knows who's boss,
the mule knows the hand that feeds him,
But not Israel.
My people don't know up from down.
Shame! Misguided God-dropouts...
Revelations 3:10
To Church of Philadelphia (Could be the usa or europe)
10"Because you kept my Word in passionate patience,
I'll keep you safe in the time of testing that will be here soon,
and all over the earth, every man, woman, and child put to the test.
11"I'm on my way; I'll be there soon. Keep a tight grip on what
you have so no one distracts you and steals your crown.
Revelation 16 the whole chapter, in every version, mentions the disasters to come, though might or might not be this wave of disasters. i really hope its not the ones now.
In China,
The government fears old buildings on the campuses, so all the students (10,000’s on each campus) have been sleeping outside in tents or the open air for some of the last 10 days. There is a lot of fear, but also a lot of vulnerability. People who have been closed to the gospel are open now. Friends who have been resisting the decision for months are jumping in with two feet. --Source from a blog of fellow workers of the harvest there.
Friday, May 16, 2008
holy spirit hears
World Awakening
It's so amazing that help is coming from all sides of the world to help
those in need when 2 major crises has struck the planet no matter
what background they're from.
Politics doesn't even seem to matter when crisis strikes.
We stop and help our brothers in need.
Yet DESPITE, we know that we know that we know ......
Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God's Spirit is right
alongside helping us along. If we don't know how or what to pray, it
doesn't matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of
our wordless sighs, our aching groans. He knows us far better than we
know ourselves, knows our tired condition, and keeps us present before God.
That's why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of
love for God is worked into something good
-(The Message version Rom 8 :26-28 )
Monday, May 12, 2008
love by the bible
SummAry of saturday's sermon:
Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn't want what it doesn't have.
Love doesn't strut,
Doesn't have a swelled head,
Doesn't force itself on others,
Isn't always "me first,"
Doesn't fly off the handle,
Doesn't keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn't revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end.
Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn't want what it doesn't have.
Love doesn't strut,
Doesn't have a swelled head,
Doesn't force itself on others,
Isn't always "me first,"
Doesn't fly off the handle,
Doesn't keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn't revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end.
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
psalm 4 (amplified bible)
To the Chief Musician; on stringed instruments. A Psalm of David.
1 ANSWER ME when I call, O God of my righteousness (uprightness, justice, and right standing with You)! You have freed me when I was hemmed in and enlarged me when I was in distress; have mercy upon me and hear my prayer.
2 O you sons of men, how long will you turn my honor and glory into shame? How long will you love vanity and futility and seek after lies? Selah [pause, and calmly think of that]!
3 But know that the Lord has set apart for Himself [and given distinction to] him who is godly [the man of loving-kindness]. The Lord listens and heeds when I call to Him.
4 Be angry [or stand in awe] and sin not; commune with your own hearts upon your beds and be silent (sorry for the things you say in your hearts). Selah [pause, and calmly think of that]!(A)
5 Offer just and right sacrifices; trust (lean on and be confident) in the Lord.
6 Many say, Oh, that we might see some good! Lift up the light of Your countenance upon us, O Lord.
7 You have put more joy and rejoicing in my heart than [they know] when their wheat and new wine have yielded abundantly.
8In peace I will both lie down and sleep, for You, Lord, alone make me dwell in safety and confident trust.
1 ANSWER ME when I call, O God of my righteousness (uprightness, justice, and right standing with You)! You have freed me when I was hemmed in and enlarged me when I was in distress; have mercy upon me and hear my prayer.
2 O you sons of men, how long will you turn my honor and glory into shame? How long will you love vanity and futility and seek after lies? Selah [pause, and calmly think of that]!
3 But know that the Lord has set apart for Himself [and given distinction to] him who is godly [the man of loving-kindness]. The Lord listens and heeds when I call to Him.
4 Be angry [or stand in awe] and sin not; commune with your own hearts upon your beds and be silent (sorry for the things you say in your hearts). Selah [pause, and calmly think of that]!(A)
5 Offer just and right sacrifices; trust (lean on and be confident) in the Lord.
6 Many say, Oh, that we might see some good! Lift up the light of Your countenance upon us, O Lord.
7 You have put more joy and rejoicing in my heart than [they know] when their wheat and new wine have yielded abundantly.
8In peace I will both lie down and sleep, for You, Lord, alone make me dwell in safety and confident trust.
Sunday, May 4, 2008
post china trip
Its been a long, unemotional, yet exciting week
Taking a trip down to China, the place of rich history, and the ancient home of my predecessors has taken up my entire past week and it was a great one.
The lessons and truths learnt reached deep into my heart and I've been moved by some of the things:-
That there is much light in people's hearts despite the darkness in the land.
There is a deep curiosity and searching and passion for truth.
Drawing strength from the Source directly is so important.
He cares for the workers as much as He cares for His kingdom. (This i want to experience more...)
"Everything is part of the process" is what encouraged me....in life, there can be so many obstacles and moulding processes that could hurt but well......smile.....you're really part of the process of something potentially beautiful.
And it occurred to me, hey, every single person in this world cannot be perfect. there is just no way our intentions would always be pure or godly, or good even. Even the most religious fanatic or churchgoer would have his mistakes in life etc. if you do not believe me, take a look at the bible. God's people have sinned one way or another or they really doubted God. Yet...
Even Romans (written by paul) has said "For All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God." Yes we may have the seemingly outwardly best intentions sometimes but if we look a lot deeper, "Yea, right! As if!" The heart can be deceitful. The Lord looks at our hearts, as well as actions.
I'm so glad i'm forgiven by Him.
Taking a trip down to China, the place of rich history, and the ancient home of my predecessors has taken up my entire past week and it was a great one.
The lessons and truths learnt reached deep into my heart and I've been moved by some of the things:-
That there is much light in people's hearts despite the darkness in the land.
There is a deep curiosity and searching and passion for truth.
Drawing strength from the Source directly is so important.
He cares for the workers as much as He cares for His kingdom. (This i want to experience more...)
"Everything is part of the process" is what encouraged me....in life, there can be so many obstacles and moulding processes that could hurt but well......smile.....you're really part of the process of something potentially beautiful.
And it occurred to me, hey, every single person in this world cannot be perfect. there is just no way our intentions would always be pure or godly, or good even. Even the most religious fanatic or churchgoer would have his mistakes in life etc. if you do not believe me, take a look at the bible. God's people have sinned one way or another or they really doubted God. Yet...
Even Romans (written by paul) has said "For All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God." Yes we may have the seemingly outwardly best intentions sometimes but if we look a lot deeper, "Yea, right! As if!" The heart can be deceitful. The Lord looks at our hearts, as well as actions.
I'm so glad i'm forgiven by Him.
Friday, April 18, 2008
significance
I felt really uplifted at this week's tuesday because i was encouraged!! yea, by some words spoken prophetically thru prayer group time and one of the leaders. 'bout moi. yea lil' ol' moi. see, often we see ourselves as soo little...we don't think we're significant...but yea the cliche "God knows me" is said and we wonder...how or why or who is God. or why would God "know me".
That remains a mystery....or does it?
That remains a mystery....or does it?
expose! (joseph's story)
one of my Bible study lessons i had with one of the
Crusade (Nus and Ntu combined batches. about 3 batches combined)
our group did the study of Joseph.
His brothers did not love him at all. (some because of jealousy, some because of
anger at their father's lack of fairness). But of course, some were good.
That was just the childhood/teenager stage.
Throughout their lives, some were up to, well, a lot of immoral stuff and some had
serious anger issues, due to the same reasons mentioned above and other reasons
(envy of favour from the father, rights).
At the end of Jacob's life, he finally exposed and scolded his sons' wrongdoing
(not all were scolded, some were righteous). And gave them a character summary.
(kinda amusing yet...shocking)
I wonder why Jacob knew everything but didn't talk about it or correct them till
the end.
Crusade (Nus and Ntu combined batches. about 3 batches combined)
our group did the study of Joseph.
His brothers did not love him at all. (some because of jealousy, some because of
anger at their father's lack of fairness). But of course, some were good.
That was just the childhood/teenager stage.
Throughout their lives, some were up to, well, a lot of immoral stuff and some had
serious anger issues, due to the same reasons mentioned above and other reasons
(envy of favour from the father, rights).
At the end of Jacob's life, he finally exposed and scolded his sons' wrongdoing
(not all were scolded, some were righteous). And gave them a character summary.
(kinda amusing yet...shocking)
I wonder why Jacob knew everything but didn't talk about it or correct them till
the end.
Saturday, April 12, 2008
the tears he sees
.... (oopz warning...another un-lighthearted post ahead)
"When you were under the fig tree I saw you." John 1:48
This week was somewhat changed by a video i watched. One might think "oh its one of those lame videos on youtube" But no. this was a real one though not from our country. And though i happened to watch it on wednesday by sheer chance because this man out of nowhere (well he was the printer toner changer), was so overwhelmed by this video his friend took of his own country, depicting a scene of well, a mild crime done by a young girl (about 13-14 yrs old) but the group took serious vengeance on her which was way more than "tooth for tooth" for her mild crime.
This was in the man's own country (not here) and there he was exposing his own country. If there was one thing positive and beautiful about the whole thing, it was that this man knew what the group of people did was wrong. And was exposing the sin of his own nation to us from another nation and telling us how sad he felt about his countrymen's violence. He also felt very bad for the poor girl.
I thought about this: why would a person not overwhelmed by grief for his own people and their wrongdoing tell this to someone not in their own country?
"When you were under the fig tree I saw you." John 1:48
This week was somewhat changed by a video i watched. One might think "oh its one of those lame videos on youtube" But no. this was a real one though not from our country. And though i happened to watch it on wednesday by sheer chance because this man out of nowhere (well he was the printer toner changer), was so overwhelmed by this video his friend took of his own country, depicting a scene of well, a mild crime done by a young girl (about 13-14 yrs old) but the group took serious vengeance on her which was way more than "tooth for tooth" for her mild crime.
This was in the man's own country (not here) and there he was exposing his own country. If there was one thing positive and beautiful about the whole thing, it was that this man knew what the group of people did was wrong. And was exposing the sin of his own nation to us from another nation and telling us how sad he felt about his countrymen's violence. He also felt very bad for the poor girl.
I thought about this: why would a person not overwhelmed by grief for his own people and their wrongdoing tell this to someone not in their own country?
Thursday, April 3, 2008
interesting
**this post has been edited and improved as it was first written at a bleak season. the bleak season has since changed to....a lighthearted one so thus the edit**
SOZO, a Christian outreach ministry that particularly ministers to Healing came down to church recently.
And they conducted full day workshops for people from church who signed up for it (like say 200 people). And they didn't charge us for the workshops.
The amazing part was their sensitivity to God's voice. (surprisingly quite accurate)
Like there were cases of people with for example, childhood or teenage issues that did affect them but
they never really really dealt with the issues properly, nor sought help
and some might have even forgot the issue altogether!
But the thing is the issue itself resurfaced in later stages of their lives, like say in dealing with a certain type of people,
they may get more agitated or may get more fearful etc. And people around wonder why on earth this person is
acting this way or simply label them as "always like that" or "he/she's like that one".
For this kind of cases and people and labels, 65% could be because of their parents (can be a mother or a father issue),
siblings, close friends who brought about hurts, rejection, fear, etc. BUT there's still 35% which is their personal choice. I mean come on.....how can issues be 100% due to what happens to us? There's still the Holy Spirit (for Christians) to guide etc.
So if you meet people with "interesting traits" they most likely may have, childhood roots. But i still want to mention the 35% is the individual's choice of how to react to the bad situation.
Had some strange dream i had on fri night about 3 strange life stories of 3 guys (3 different stages in life), oh well....
SOZO, a Christian outreach ministry that particularly ministers to Healing came down to church recently.
And they conducted full day workshops for people from church who signed up for it (like say 200 people). And they didn't charge us for the workshops.
The amazing part was their sensitivity to God's voice. (surprisingly quite accurate)
Like there were cases of people with for example, childhood or teenage issues that did affect them but
they never really really dealt with the issues properly, nor sought help
and some might have even forgot the issue altogether!
But the thing is the issue itself resurfaced in later stages of their lives, like say in dealing with a certain type of people,
they may get more agitated or may get more fearful etc. And people around wonder why on earth this person is
acting this way or simply label them as "always like that" or "he/she's like that one".
For this kind of cases and people and labels, 65% could be because of their parents (can be a mother or a father issue),
siblings, close friends who brought about hurts, rejection, fear, etc. BUT there's still 35% which is their personal choice. I mean come on.....how can issues be 100% due to what happens to us? There's still the Holy Spirit (for Christians) to guide etc.
So if you meet people with "interesting traits" they most likely may have, childhood roots. But i still want to mention the 35% is the individual's choice of how to react to the bad situation.
Had some strange dream i had on fri night about 3 strange life stories of 3 guys (3 different stages in life), oh well....
Monday, March 24, 2008
Anyway whatever it is....i always have this mindset, HAPPYNESS or Happiness awaits!
In Will Smith's Pursuit of Happyness (2006) he was wondering whether it was really Happiness itself or the pursuit of it that was truly satisfying. What do you think?
Seriously, even though I'm a student of Literature....that was SEC 1-4. I did not take Lit in JC or Uni. Wait, in Uni i took two modules (extra modules out of interest). I do not get people's blogs. At all, unless their really soooo.......sooo......like blatant.
Things i did today (instead of Things To Do):
1) Go to teach lessons today when my student didn't come! talk about waste of transport money and effort and time.
2) To make up for lost time and effort, i looked around for more assignments.
3) I found one assignment. the monies its paying is incredibly low. But I'm not going for the monies. i just want to help someone.
4) I paid for my plane tickets.
5) I bumped into my church mate
6) I went around Chinatown. (got lost)
In Will Smith's Pursuit of Happyness (2006) he was wondering whether it was really Happiness itself or the pursuit of it that was truly satisfying. What do you think?
Seriously, even though I'm a student of Literature....that was SEC 1-4. I did not take Lit in JC or Uni. Wait, in Uni i took two modules (extra modules out of interest). I do not get people's blogs. At all, unless their really soooo.......sooo......like blatant.
Things i did today (instead of Things To Do):
1) Go to teach lessons today when my student didn't come! talk about waste of transport money and effort and time.
2) To make up for lost time and effort, i looked around for more assignments.
3) I found one assignment. the monies its paying is incredibly low. But I'm not going for the monies. i just want to help someone.
4) I paid for my plane tickets.
5) I bumped into my church mate
6) I went around Chinatown. (got lost)
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Speaking of the US elections 2008....lol
A wise Christian person once mentioned this to a group he was talking to:
"People often put their worth and esteem in others' opinion of them, which is precisely the thing that will disappoint them. But if we put it in the hands of God..."
now THAT...would be something different...
Anyway, noticed how people keep singing songs "She will be loved" (e.g. maroon 5) and talk about being and getting loved.
Is the source from humans' supply endless and constant? (again, rhetorical question).
Saturday, March 15, 2008
writers
Well let's see,
Either way the outcome goes i thank God and i see good in the ways it could go. Thankful this process of whether i'm to go or not is taking ages. It has been pretty nervous-ing....(gee is there such a word?) like i see the good and bad side of going and not going to that land....
the other question is even if it's a no this year, maybe i still have to go next year....and then it might be another place.
Hmm on to the topic of blogs now.
The Fact about blogs is that they are all words.
Words spoken and written Affect people who hear and see,
The writer's meaning may differ from the hearer's interpretation.
Just like the bible, when a study is done on it....different people interpret it differently.
Either way the outcome goes i thank God and i see good in the ways it could go. Thankful this process of whether i'm to go or not is taking ages. It has been pretty nervous-ing....(gee is there such a word?) like i see the good and bad side of going and not going to that land....
the other question is even if it's a no this year, maybe i still have to go next year....and then it might be another place.
Hmm on to the topic of blogs now.
The Fact about blogs is that they are all words.
Words spoken and written Affect people who hear and see,
The writer's meaning may differ from the hearer's interpretation.
Just like the bible, when a study is done on it....different people interpret it differently.
Sunday, March 9, 2008
Isaiah 60:21
Oooh! My 77th post was the previous one. My favourite number is seven!!
For once, i do not have prepared with me some abstract thought.
Its been a maddening week...for but in no way are am i weak.
oh boy... oh boy... oh boy...
BUT God will restore Generation Y (or X).
He would add substance to His people...just like in
For once, i do not have prepared with me some abstract thought.
Its been a maddening week...for but in no way are am i weak.
oh boy... oh boy... oh boy...
BUT God will restore Generation Y (or X).
He would add substance to His people...just like in
Isaiah 60:21
21 Then will all your people be righteous
and they will possess the land forever.
They are the shoot I have planted,
the work of my hands,
for the display of my splendor.
I'm glad to catch up with old friends like today.
I wish i could compose songs on the spot like the preacher today.
I wish Singaporeans would all go visit at least 3 nations not in their comfort zone....
21 Then will all your people be righteous
and they will possess the land forever.
They are the shoot I have planted,
the work of my hands,
for the display of my splendor.
I'm glad to catch up with old friends like today.
I wish i could compose songs on the spot like the preacher today.
I wish Singaporeans would all go visit at least 3 nations not in their comfort zone....
Thursday, February 28, 2008
life goals
Yea, the list of all the things people create at ages in their life....
when we were
8, we thought we wanted to be doctors, lawyers....we didn't think at all.
At 12, all we thought about was passing the Primary school finals well.
At 14-16, it was the new world of....guys?
At 17-18, we wanted the As in school, the scholarship, wanted fame, wanted the best relationships, wanted to excel in sports...
From 19 to 23.....College was good for most....i would presume.
when we were
8, we thought we wanted to be doctors, lawyers....we didn't think at all.
At 12, all we thought about was passing the Primary school finals well.
At 14-16, it was the new world of....guys?
At 17-18, we wanted the As in school, the scholarship, wanted fame, wanted the best relationships, wanted to excel in sports...
From 19 to 23.....College was good for most....i would presume.
Saturday, February 16, 2008
To a natural person, this situation would have been nice, secure, good, normal.
But now.....I'm so at peace yet screaming for the grace, the strength, the etc etc etc.
Well if anything, at least
1) I'm being decisive for once
2) It's not going to be easy but it'll be one nice marathon (not literally)
3) I'll get a chance to work and think and REST a bit.....before the real marathon starts
But now.....I'm so at peace yet screaming for the grace, the strength, the etc etc etc.
Well if anything, at least
1) I'm being decisive for once
2) It's not going to be easy but it'll be one nice marathon (not literally)
3) I'll get a chance to work and think and REST a bit.....before the real marathon starts
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
vietnam history
Vietnam War
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Noted historian and author Gabriel Kolko has observed, "If we use conventional military criteria, the Americans should have been victorious. They used 15 million tons of munitions (as much as they employed in World War Two), had a vast military superiority over their enemies by any standard one employs, and still they were defeated."Edward N. Luttwak of Time Magazine said, “The customary reward of defeat, if one can survive it, is in the lessons thereby learned, which may yield victory in the next war. But the circumstances of our defeat in Vietnam were sufficiently ambiguous to deny the nation (that) benefit."
Over 1.4 million military personnel were killed in the war (approximately 6% were members of the United States armed forces), while estimates of civilian fatalities range from 2 to 5.1 million. On April 30, 1975, the capital of South Vietnam, Saigon fell to the communist forces of North Vietnam, effectively ending the Vietnam War.
Names for the conflict
Various names have been applied to the conflict, like the war of death and hell on earth, and these have shifted over time, although Vietnam War is the most commonly used title in English. It has been variously called the Second Indochina War, the Vietnam Conflict, the Vietnam War, and, in Vietnamese, Chiến tranh Việt Nam (The Vietnam War) or Kháng chiến chống Mỹ (Resistance War against America).
- Second Indochina War: places the conflict into context with other distinct, but related, and contiguous conflicts in Southeast Asia. Vietnam, Laos, and Cambodia are seen as the battlegrounds of a larger Indochinese conflict that began at the end of World War II and lasted until communist victory in 1975. This conflict can be viewed in terms of the demise of colonialism and its after-effects during the Cold War.
- Vietnam Conflict: largely a U.S. designation, it acknowledges that the United States Congress never declared war on North Vietnam. Legally, the President used his constitutional discretion—supplemented by supportive resolutions in Congress—to conduct what was said to be a “police action”.
- Vietnam War: the most commonly used designation in English, it suggests that the location of the war was exclusively within the borders of North and South Vietnam, failing to recognize its wider context.
- Resistance War against the Americans to Save the Nation: the term favored by North Vietnam; it is more of a saying than a name, and its meaning is self-evident. Its usage has been abolished in recent years as the government of Vietnam seeks better relations with the U.S. Official Vietnamese publications now refer to the conflict generically as “Chiến tranh Việt Nam” (Vietnam War).
Background to 1949
Exit of the French, 1950–1954
The Geneva Conference, 1954.
In 1950, the Democratic Republic of Vietnam and China recognized each other diplomatically. The Soviet Union quickly followed suit. U.S. President Harry S. Truman countered by recognizing the French puppet government of Vietnam. Washington feared that Hanoi was a pawn of Communist China and, by extension, Moscow. This flew in the face of the long historical antipathy between the two nations, of which the U.S. seems to have been completely ignorant. As Doan Huynh commented, “Vietnam a part of the Chinese expansionist game in Asia? For anyone who knows the history of Indochina, this is incomprehensible.”[8] Nevertheless, Chinese support was very important to the Viet Minh's success, and China largely supported the Vietnamese Communists through the end of the war.
The outbreak of the Korean War in 1950 marked a decisive turning point. From the perspective of many in Washington, D.C., what had been a colonial war in Indochina was transformed into another example of communist expansionism directed by the Kremlin.
In 1950, the U.S. Military Assistance and Advisory Group (MAAG) arrived to screen French requests for aid, advise on strategy and train Vietnamese soldiers.[10] By 1954, the U.S. had supplied 300,000 small arms and spent one billion dollars in support of the French military effort. The Eisenhower administration was shouldering 80% of the cost of the war. The Viet Minh received crucial support from the Soviet Union and the People's Republic of China. Chinese support in the Border Campaign of 1950 allowed supplies to come from China into Vietnam. Throughout the conflict, U.S. intelligence estimates remained skeptical of French chances of success.
The Battle of Dien Bien Phu marked the end of French involvement in Indochina. The Viet Minh and their mercurial commander Vo Nguyen Giap handed the French a stunning military defeat. On May 7, 1954, the French Union garrison surrendered. At the Geneva Conference the French negotiated a ceasefire agreement with the Viet Minh. Independence was granted to Cambodia, Laos and Vietnam. As a U.S. Army study noted, France lost the war primarily because it “neglected to cultivate the loyalty and support of the Vietnamese people.” More than 400,000 civilians and soldiers had died during the nine year conflict.
Vietnam was temporarily partitioned at the 17th parallel, and under the terms of the Geneva Convention, civilians were to be given the opportunity to freely move between the two provisional states. Nearly one million northerners (mainly Catholics) fled south in “understandable terror” of Ho Chi Minh's new regime. It is estimated that as many as two million more would have left had they not been stopped by the Viet Minh. In the north, the Viet Minh established a socialist state—the Democratic Republic of Vietnam—and engaged in a land reform program in which the mass killing of perceived “class enemies” occurred. Ho Chi Minh later apologized. In the south a non-communist state was established under the Emperor Bao Dai, a former puppet of the French and the Japanese. Ngo Dinh Diem became his Prime Minister. In addition to the Catholics flowing south, up to 90,000 Viet Minh fighters went north for “regroupment” as envisioned by the Geneva Accords. However, in contravention of the Accords, the Viet Minh left roughly 5,000-10,000 cadres in South Vietnam as a “politico-military substructure within the object of its irredentism.”
President Dwight D. Eisenhower and Secretary of State John Foster Dulles greet President Ngo Dinh Diem in Washington.
Diem era, 1955–1963
As dictated by the Geneva Conference of 1954, the partition of Vietnam was meant to be only temporary, pending national elections on July 20, 1956. Much like Korea, the agreement stipulated that the two military zones were to be separated by a temporary demarcation line (known as the Demilitarized Zone or DMZ). The United States, alone among the great powers, refused to sign the Geneva agreement. The President of South Vietnam, Ngo Dinh Diem, declined to hold elections. This called into question the United States' commitment to democracy in the region, but also raised questions about the legitimacy of any election held in the communist-run North. President Dwight D. Eisenhower expressed U.S. fears when he wrote that, in 1954, “80 per cent of the population would have voted for the Communist Ho Chi Minh” over Emperor Bao Dai. However, this wide popularity was expressed before Ho's disastrous land reform program and a peasant revolt in Ho's home province which had to be bloodily suppressed.
The cornerstone of U.S. policy was the Domino Theory. This argued that if South Vietnam fell to communist forces, then all of South East Asia would follow. Popularized by the Eisenhower Administration, some argued that if communism spread unchecked, it would follow them home by first reaching Hawaii and follow to the West Coast of the United States. It was better, therefore, to fight communism in Asia, rather than on American soil. Thus, the Domino Theory provided a powerful motive for the American creation of a client state in southern Vietnam. The theory underpinned American policy in Vietnam for five presidencies. Another important motive was the preservation of U.S. credibility and prestige.
The United States pursued a policy of containment. Following the North Atlantic Treaty Organization model, Washington established the Southeast Asia Treaty Organization (SEATO) to counter communist expansion in the region. The policy of containment was first suggested by George F. Kennan in the 1947 X Article, published anonymously in Foreign Affairs and remained U.S. policy for the next quarter of a century.
Rule
Ngo Dinh Diem was chosen by the U.S. to lead South Vietnam. A devout Roman Catholic, he was fervently anti-communist and was “untainted” by any connection to the French. He was one of the few prominent Vietnamese nationalist who could claim both attributes. Historian Luu Doan Huynh notes, however, that “Diem represented narrow and extremist nationalism coupled with autocracy and nepotism.”
The new American patrons were almost completely ignorant of Vietnamese culture. They knew little of the language or long history of the country. There was a tendency to assign American motives to Vietnamese actions, and Diem warned that it was an illusion to believe that blindly copying Western methods would solve Vietnamese problems.
In April and June 1955, Diem (against U.S. advice) cleared the decks of any political opposition by launching military operations against the Cao Dai religious sect, the Buddhist Hoa Hao, and the Binh Xuyen organized crime group (which was allied with members of the secret police and some military elements). Diem accused these groups of harboring Communist agents. As broad-based opposition to his harsh tactics mounted, Diem increasingly sought to blame the communists.
Beginning in the summer of 1955, he launched the “Denounce the Communists” campaign, during which communists and other anti-government elements were arrested, imprisoned, tortured or executed. Opponents were labeled Viet Cong by the regime to demean their nationalist credentials. During this period refugees moved across the demarcation line in both directions. Around 52,000 Vietnamese civilians moved from south to north. However a staggering 450,000 people fled north Vietnam to the south, in aircraft and ships provided by France and the U.S. CIA propaganda efforts increased the outflow with slogans such as “the Virgin Mary is going South.” The northern refugees were meant to give Diem a strong anti-communist constituency.
In a referendum on the future of the monarchy, Diem rigged the poll which was supervised by his brother Ngo Dinh Nhu and received “98.2 percent” of the vote. His American advisers had recommended a more modest winning margin of “60 to 70 percent.” Diem, however, viewed the election as a test of authority. On October 26, 1955, Diem declared the new Republic of Vietnam, with himself as president. The creation of the Republic of Vietnam was largely because of the Eisenhower administration's desire for an anti-communist state in the region. Colonel Edward Lansdale, a CIA officer, became an important advisor to the new president.
As a wealthy Catholic, Diem was viewed by many ordinary Vietnamese as part of the old elite that had helped the French rule Vietnam. The majority of Vietnamese people were Buddhist, so his attack on the Buddhist community served only to deepen mistrust. Diem's human rights abuses increasingly alienated the population.
In May, Diem undertook a ten day state visit of the United States. President Eisenhower pledged his continued support. A parade in New York City was held in his honor. Although Diem was openly praised, in private Secretary of State John Foster Dulles conceded that he had been selected because there were no better alternative.
Insurgency in the South, 1956-1960
Sunday, February 3, 2008
giving and forgiveness
Its always tough ...
to be the gentler person
the person who has to give in
even when you're not wrong
the person who lets others fight in the argument
It's also rewarding...
to be the bigger person
the person who always forgives
the person who always take the first step in reconciliation
Thank you, if you have done any one of those...
to be the gentler person
the person who has to give in
even when you're not wrong
the person who lets others fight in the argument
It's also rewarding...
to be the bigger person
the person who always forgives
the person who always take the first step in reconciliation
Thank you, if you have done any one of those...
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Sunday, January 20, 2008
vietnam trip part 3
Back to the viet days.
the last thing which was the best every thing that happened on the trip was that...
i actually went snorkling....in the sea...for real. on the day tour, all of us had to at least swim in the sea....according to the aggressive tour guide. he was hurly burly. he threatened to fine those who missed the chance to dive in.
Only later did a friend point out he was only joking. Still...the effect remained.
so i was like "whoa! gotta brace myself for the cold waters...", while praying frantically for good waters. since i was already at south china sea, might as well try!! gulp!
and hey didn't Lily, one of my little korean students, jump into the sea when she was only 6 before? finally...it was really the Aussie tourists on the boat that whoa....inspired me. they just jumped from the top of the boat...without life vests. and they went "ahh!! warm! just like australian waters". so that was it.
Tum-bied (bye).
the last thing which was the best every thing that happened on the trip was that...
i actually went snorkling....in the sea...for real. on the day tour, all of us had to at least swim in the sea....according to the aggressive tour guide. he was hurly burly. he threatened to fine those who missed the chance to dive in.
Only later did a friend point out he was only joking. Still...the effect remained.
so i was like "whoa! gotta brace myself for the cold waters...", while praying frantically for good waters. since i was already at south china sea, might as well try!! gulp!
and hey didn't Lily, one of my little korean students, jump into the sea when she was only 6 before? finally...it was really the Aussie tourists on the boat that whoa....inspired me. they just jumped from the top of the boat...without life vests. and they went "ahh!! warm! just like australian waters". so that was it.
Tum-bied (bye).
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Vietnam Part 2
shucks man, lost that burst of word prowess i had last week. maybe that "inspirational feeling" of those holiday "mountain top" experience, just like any other spiritual high, does wear off.
but the substance, the real deep stuff that impacts or impacted u, the truth of the matter, the lessons learnt etc etc, runs deep.
So the next big thing i did was conquer the fear of TRAFFIC. ha. bet no one knew this. so embarrassing. i never liked and always tried avoiding jaywalking. i would rather wait the next round of green traffic lights to cross a Singapore road. that was .....vietnam!! imagine 10-15 rows of motorbikes er, aiming at you......if you're lucky they slow down.....no lah they generally all TRY to slow down when they see people crossing. but traffic lights do not help at all. unless there is some marshall around.
the next scary experience is yet to be written.
but the substance, the real deep stuff that impacts or impacted u, the truth of the matter, the lessons learnt etc etc, runs deep.
So the next big thing i did was conquer the fear of TRAFFIC. ha. bet no one knew this. so embarrassing. i never liked and always tried avoiding jaywalking. i would rather wait the next round of green traffic lights to cross a Singapore road. that was .....vietnam!! imagine 10-15 rows of motorbikes er, aiming at you......if you're lucky they slow down.....no lah they generally all TRY to slow down when they see people crossing. but traffic lights do not help at all. unless there is some marshall around.
the next scary experience is yet to be written.
Friday, January 4, 2008
Vietnam part 1
Its like singapore back in the 1970s
this trip has proved to be a very culture enriching one....of both modern and a i would say, more backward nation. The traces of the french colony was all around like buildings, architecture and maybe manners/culture. backpacking not literally but rather, going without a tour guide and just navigating on your own was somewhat different compared to the korea escapade in june this year where everything right down to the meals(!!!) were planned for us.
There were 3 things i did that i wouldn't do if i were in my comfort zone of dear singapore.
the first was the cuchi tunnels.
call it harmless and "just a playground" where adults have to be kids again and just bend and crawl?? Nah!! you could feel the horror, from the musty-smell of the 50 over year old tunnels used to house thousands of war victims during the vietnam war. there were some stretches of it which was just PITCH black, you couldn't see your own fingers!! tensions were high as some of us crawled through, feeling the anguish, the helplessness of those of thew 1950s who had to endure the 5km cuchi tunnels for a chance at survival from the war. people actually lived in those?
more laterz......
this trip has proved to be a very culture enriching one....of both modern and a i would say, more backward nation. The traces of the french colony was all around like buildings, architecture and maybe manners/culture. backpacking not literally but rather, going without a tour guide and just navigating on your own was somewhat different compared to the korea escapade in june this year where everything right down to the meals(!!!) were planned for us.
There were 3 things i did that i wouldn't do if i were in my comfort zone of dear singapore.
the first was the cuchi tunnels.
call it harmless and "just a playground" where adults have to be kids again and just bend and crawl?? Nah!! you could feel the horror, from the musty-smell of the 50 over year old tunnels used to house thousands of war victims during the vietnam war. there were some stretches of it which was just PITCH black, you couldn't see your own fingers!! tensions were high as some of us crawled through, feeling the anguish, the helplessness of those of thew 1950s who had to endure the 5km cuchi tunnels for a chance at survival from the war. people actually lived in those?
more laterz......
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